Thursday, December 08, 2005

EXCLUSIVE: Luskin and Novak's Original Strategy

A high level source has provided us with a copy of Luskin's original strategy that he had planned to deliver to Fitzgerald to stave off an indictment against his client, Karl Rove.

According to our source, Luskin and Novak had agreed to use the above photo - which we have determined to be a horribly doctored security camera image from a Washington, D.C. Fortune Teller's shop - to convince Fitzgerald not to indict the fragile Turdblossom. Luskin was apparently ready to testify that he and Viveca Novak had knocked back a few too many Irish Car Bombs and stumbled into 'Madame Tshurka's Bleeding Palm' velvet ensconced , paranormal nook. He continued to say that Luskin and Novak had agreed to frame out this scenario under oath:
"After 15 minutes of trying to persuade the crystal ball into contacting the long lost soul of Woodward's journalistic career, Novak asked the following benign question... "Who was Matt Cooper's source for Valerie Plame's name?" Suddenly, all the lights went out and a cold breeze blew out the candles despite the fact that all the windows and doors were closed. The table rumbled, the tarot cards scattered and the crystal ball began to glow and swirl with clouds and demonic faces. Then, as if by magic, the crystal ball crackled with electricity and a ghostly apparition of Karl Rove burst from the ball, laughing maniacally. The Karl Rove spirit then disappeared into the small, adjacent bathroom and plunged head long into the toilet and disappeared. The lights flickered back to normality and Luskin plunked down 2 crisp $100 bills and he and Novak left without getting a receipt."
Personally, I think that the above story and photo would have gone over as a more believable than the one they are currently trying to float with Fitzgerald.

Update: I should have provided more information about the weakness of Luskin's strategy that he decided to go with. As Jane is pointing out over at firedoglake, there is an apparent discrepancy between Novak and Luskin as to when their meeting took place. While that certainly looks bad, in my opinion it is overshadowed by the fact that Luskin waited until the last second to provide information of the Novak/Luskin meeting to Fitzgerald. It smacks of desperation and stall tactics.